Showing posts with label God's Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God's Love. Show all posts

Monday, April 18, 2016

Gaining Understanding

By Nancy Turley
 
"You don't know what you don't know when you're young.” (and sometimes old - added by N. Turley)  (The original quote is from Lots Of Candles, Plenty Of Cake, Advice to My Younger Self by Anna Quindlen)

"A wise (wo)man will hear and increase with learning. And a (wo)man of understanding will acquire wise counsel.”
"For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding; he stores up sound wisdom for the upright.”
 “Keep sound wisdom and discretion. So they will be life to your soul.”
                            
“All her paths are peace. She is tree of life to those who take hold of her and happy are all who hold her fast.”  
                            Proverbs.1:5, 2:6-7a, 3:21b-22a; and 3:17 , 18a (NASV)

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt…  
                             James 1:5. 6a (NIV)
Recently I attended a Lunch and Learn seminar sponsored by our safety department at work. The title was “Cause Mapping.” The hook for the seminar was, “Do you know the reason the Titanic sank?” Most of us immediately went to the main cause—that the ocean cruiser ran into an iceberg—as well as a few other explanations, but what surprised all of us was, in the end, 123 reasons were found to be causes or the “whys?” that so many lives were lost when this ship sank.
The discussion was fascinating as we further learned that had just one or two of these causes been fixed or paid heed to in the earlier time line of what led to the Titanic’s demise, the ship may not have sunk and so many lives been lost. Had the bulkhead been sealed correctly, had the SS Californian responded earlier, had the rudders been fashioned to turn more quickly, had there not been such arrogance of the designer and captain that this ship was “unsinkable”—many, or all, of those 1523 lives would not have perished.
Lately I’ve been pondering about other “sinking causes”—people or things that seem to be sinking or situations where the ship is heading towards an iceberg about to tear a big hole in lives or already has. 

To what degree does the universal and Biblical adage of “what you sow, you will reap” create a pathway that cannot be reversed? To what degree do earlier choices pave that more problematic life pathway that then makes it so hard to make a turn-about? Is there a statute of limitations on how soon we have to turn around before it’s too late to alter present life circumstances, to realize the potential God created us for? 
 

The law of cause and effect can’t be easily overruled just because we are sorry later on. I want to understand my own, and others, “cause mapping.”  I want to understand the root causes of behaviors, the whys of our journeys. But much more than that, I want to see hope despite the small and big ships that have sunk in our lives. In the midst of negative circumstances caused by wrong, ignorant or even innocent choices we made along the way. I want to see grace override that and see how God is weaving it for good.  I want wisdom for us to navigate in the midst of our present journeys. I want to see a redemptive ending despite difficult current pathways. 

I do think years of life can add wisdom, but even in our more “mature” age we still are figuring out that “we don’t know what we don’t know.” And some 20 and 30 year olds have much more wisdom at their age than I ever had at that age (or may ever have).  How did they get that? How do any of us obtain wisdom and where does that start? How, does one gain understanding that provides a reason to keep going and hopefully, have some kind of happier ending? 
  

In the case of the Titanic, for those that survived, it was because they had access to the lifeboats and were fortunate to be able to climb aboard, or others held onto a buoyant part of the blown apart boat, or perhaps had the stamina to tread water longer than others and they lived long enough to be pulled in when thrown a lifesaver. 

For those of us who are drowning or feel like we are sinking, there is another lifesaving tool, that story twist that can still give us a “happy ending.” It’s when we ask for wisdom from God who says He’ll generously give it to us. But before that can happen, it seems we first have to see our part in our demise (or our need for something beyond ourselves), and admit that God is the author of the wisdom we need. It’s a cross-roads place of faith that truly trusts God has our backs, where we truly expect an answer. And to be able to walk in that happier ending we need to accept and act on the wisdom given

Regardless of the causes, it’s when we swim towards the lifesaver God throws out to us or climb aboard the lifeboat, that we receive grace and start the journey towards gaining understanding. 
I love that wisdom brings life to our souls and that its paths are peace. I love that wisdom is like a tree of life and thus promises a fruitful future—that acting on what we know we need to do (or not do), will put us on a forward path again. That, despite the cause, or how deeply sunk we may feel, there is a lifeboat to bring us back to firm land.
And for those of us praying for others whose rudders are not turning fast enough to avoid looming icebergs: perhaps our prayer should be that they are led to a point to cry out for rescue and ask for wisdom. Because then...they (and we) have the opportunity by learning and acquiring wise counsel, to get to the place of practicing more of what we then know we know.
And, the further good news is that "God gives grace to those who are afflicted." (Proverbs 3:34 -NASB). He does not have a statute of limitations if we call on Him to help us.  He can turn around and redeem the difficult circumstances of our lives and work them all together for good. 

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

The Making of a Hospital Mom


"When the Unthinkable becomes your Reality, 
you have two choices: Regret or Redemption"  ~ The Hospital Mom


On January 27, 1999 the unthinkable became our reality. Our pink and precious daughter of 6 months suffered a massive mid-cerebral arterial stroke. The main artery between her spine and her brain had become blocked from a blood clot at the juncture where it splits into the left and right hemispheres. Worldwide, 1 in 25,000 live births will suffer a stroke each year.  

The years that have followed have been tumultuous. Doctors, therapies, drug studies, seizures, and surgeries. There are times where I felt I have earned doctoral degrees in Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Pharmacology, Neurology, Developmental Pediatrics and Child Psychology from the Mother's Medical Institute.

At any moment I can walk into an emergency room and speak in medical terms with any nurse, doctor or specialist. Pity the poor nurse who argued with me that my child could not possibly have suffered a stroke. "Children do not have strokes," she said with condescending authority.

Ashley was having seizures and I walked into the emergency room in Tulsa, Oklahoma telling the medical team what she needed. I had been on the phone with her neurologist and we agreed I could transport her to the hospital quicker than an ambulance could find me - plus I was already in the car and on my way - and he would meet me there.  

My dad met us at the hospital and while he entertained my 25 month old daughter, I politely asked the nurse to step outside the room. "Never tell a parent in front of a child that they are making up a diagnosis, especially one this horrid," I said with the indignation of a mom who was living the unimaginable. The nurse continued to argue with me as the doctor approached and I told her to go pull up the MRI and CT scans from the past 2 years. "I will," she assured me and stomped off, hands on her hips. And she did. The neurologist arrived, treatment began and later, he brought a very apologetic nurse into the room and assured her that infants do indeed have strokes.  

That night I realized that parents must be advocates for their children. As the years passed, I learned most parents are so intimated by the medical process, hospital personnel and are simply overwhelmed by their situation that they are afraid to speak up. They will accept whatever is told them and not ask questions, advocate for help or seek solutions for their children.  

I have worked with families in numerous settings - adult education centers, as a parent advocate in schools, at church and as a chaplain. The redemption of Ashley's story is in sharing the wisdom, education and experiences we have gained in this struggle.  

Parents of chronically medically challenged children are more likely to divorce, have extra-marital affairs and battle addictions. As their world centers around their children, hospitals and the medical world, they withdraw into themselves and face depression while living in a constant state of regret - the "would of, could of, should of" state of mind.  



Our purpose is simple:
         To provide Hope and Humor to Families of Chronically Medically Challenged Children. 

The ways we do that are numerous:
         Website - Hospitalmom.net
         Facebook - Hospital Mom
         Writing for Blogs like this one and at HospitalMom.net
         Answering Emails of Hurting Families at      
                    Kim@hospitalmom.net
         H.O.P.E. Delivery Bags for Caregivers at Hospitals

Currently, I am writing a book to bring Hope to Families. The following is an excerpt from "Beautifully Complicated," the story of redeeming the hurt in our lives in order "to Know HIM and Make HIM Known."




from BEAUTIFULLY COMPLICATED

“This is my Father’s World
and to my listening ears
    All nature sings and ‘round me rings
The beauty of the sphere.”

Eighteen years ago I first sang this song to my infant baby girl. Born early - eager to change our world. Born tiny - proving size does not matter. Born the baby sister - her brother in love with her before she was before. Born a surprise - her daddy named her the moment he saw the positive pregnancy test. 

“This is my Father’s World
I rest me in the thought
   Of rocks and trees; of skies and seas
His hand the wonders wrought.”

Fifteen times I have laid her on an operating table and sang those words in her ear as she drifted to sleep. Sometimes easily.  Sometimes fearfully, gripping my hand.  Sometimes I have had tears in own voice and many times, I have sang to a room full of surgeons and technicians who came to the operating theater because they had heard of this family who sang before surgery and wanted to experience the peace that is in the room.



Three times I have sang this hymn in the surgery waiting room because that facility did not allow me to accompany her into the operating room.

Eighteen surgeries.  

        Thousands of miles driven in rain, snow, sunshine and shadow. 

        Months our family has lived apart - separated by 8 hours and the Rocky Mountains.

        Dozens of professionals. Hundreds of medications. Thousands of phone calls to doctors.  
Ten Thousands of hours in research by specialists and parents.   

        Millions of prayers raised by family, friends and even strangers.

This indeed is My Father's World. The Unthinkable will happen because this world is in a fallen state where the sin of mankind has brought heartache. Yet God redeems the pain of our fallen state to help each other. When we help each other that pain becomes bearable, even manageable as we allow Him to reveal His glory as we live other lives for others.  


           “This is my Father's world. 
                    O let me ne'er forget 
              that though the wrong seems oft so strong, 
                   God is the ruler yet. 

            This is my Father's world: 
                   why should my heart be sad? 
            The Lord is King; let the heavens ring! 
                  God reigns; let the earth be glad!”



Are you living the Unthinkable?  

Where you never dreamed you would be?

Are you living in Regret - depressed, lonely, self-pity -  or in Redemption?

As you listen to the song below, go to God in Prayer and 
ask the Father -

"How will you redeem the pain in my life?  
Who can I serve?"




"This is Our Father's World"
Our Favorite Version! Enjoy!




Monday, December 14, 2015

And Yet, I Ponder This

 © Nancy Turley  

'Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day.”   II Corinthians 4:6

“I would have despaired unless I had believed I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living." Psalm 27:13
       


My heart is rent for those who grieve for a lost spouse, for lost health, for a lost dream.
It aches for those who grasp for healing and find no present cure,
Who hunger for relief in spirit or body while the earth still spins,
Who mourn what cannot be recovered.


And yet, I ponder this:
       Those that have lost know more clearly what really matters.
       Those who cry deeply for their loved ones still celebrate their joy in heaven.

       Those in pain yet hold on to the hope of their calling by the heavenly Artist.


I question why some awaken to deep pain in the night,
How shadows steal rest or joy until they see morning light,
How life is taken unfairly by tongs of the unknown or evil
.


And yet, I ponder this: 
     Those who know the Artist know He uses dark and light colors to accentuate truth,
     That melded colors of shadow and light blend together for good,

     That there is still hope for the future and meaning in the present.


I consider how the body ages despite the care one might take.
I ruminate on the “what ifs” of having had more time for a more balanced life.
I contemplate how life is bound to the clock marching forward. 


And yet, I ponder this:     
    That the heart and spirit can be renewed while bones lose density and skin wrinkles.
    That time is both chronos and kairos,
    That we can be lost in moments of joy when time does not beat nor the body decay.


I reflect on unanswered questions, unfilled potential and hearts longing to soar, I contemplate how some still hope while others despair.
I ponder the mystery of faith, those who glimpse that which can’t be seen,
Of those who still seek melody in the midst of a dissonant world.


  And I rejoice as I ponder this:     
      That we can rise as eagles when we rest in the brush strokes of the Artist,

      That there is truth in paradox: we grow in the dark and in dying we live.
      And that those who sing to the celestial Artist harmonize to an eternal beat.

Monday, December 7, 2015

The Administration of Reconciliation

By Tawna Wilkinson

    

The other day, I had a hard and messy conversation with an individual regarding their dissatisfaction with the church, and what they felt was wrong with it. The truth is I was hurt and very frustrated, as this wasn’t the first time I’d been approached with the same thing.

However, after I allowed myself the shabby process of sorting out my raw emotions with God and my husband, the Lord reminded of II Corinthians 5:17-21:

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation. Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God. For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.”
I realized if things were the way He intended in the beginning, there would be no need for our administrating reconciliation. For when things are reconciled, they are back to the way they were created to be.

When Christ was here He waded through enormous dysfunction with people’s perceptions of what He needed to do to make things right – in the synagogues; with the Pharisees and crowds; with the twelve men He hand-picked to journey with Him; even with his mother and siblings. And though Scripture doesn’t give much detail about His childhood, I can’t help but think there was a lot of muddling He had to endure just being a kid and teenager.
We want things to be neat and tidy; to be okay. And more times than not, I think that means, the way I want them to be. We hate the groaning our spirits, bodies and souls experience when we perceive things are not the way they’re supposed to be. And the last thing we want to do is stick around and engage in the hard work of restoration.

 Several years ago, a wise young man said to me, “Relationships are messy, and no one wants to get involved in them.” He was right. It’s obvious. When things don’t go the way we want, our first reaction is to bail…. don’t stick around and muddle through the mess and confusing in-betweens. It hurts. It’s hard. We have no promise that we’re going to see resolution. And what’s worse, we have no control over the outcome, let alone another’s choice.
I completely understand. I’ve bailed more times than I care to admit. I’ve thrown my hands up in frustration umpteen times, “knowing” for certain things are never going to change. But if that is true, then this passage of Scripture isn’t.

So today, I am actually thankful for the individual approaching me. For although the issue was not resolved, I now see I was presented with another opportunity to use my “ambassador muscles.” God, and this person, trusted me with part of the messy process of bringing a piece of reconciliation to this beautiful, broken and messy world. And I am glad I chose to engage in it.



Monday, October 19, 2015

The Power of Encourgament

By Kim Beach
Who doesn't like a surprise party?

Well, evidently I don't. I've been the recipient of two surprise parties in my lifetime and both times I was so determined to stay home that I almost missed my own celebrations.     

Recently some of my dear girlfriends dressed as Pirates - in honor of my favorite movies -  and threw me a Surprise Birthday / Encouragement Party. There was sushi and pirate booty, pirate punch, cannonball meatballs and even a Pirate Ship chocolate cake! The wackiness was great, the laughter healing and I'm so glad they were able to get me to my own party!


Their gifts to me that evening were simple & yet extravagant.

Their time.

Their attention.

Their love.




Then each person took time to share with me either a scripture or word that God had shown them I needed to hear; they shared what I had meant to them in their lives.

It was awesome and humbling. 





This season of our life has been long and hard and weary. There are days that getting dressed is a major victory. These ladies have stood with me, prayed for me and stood in the gap when I could no longer pray at all.

As they shared words like Determined and Listen and scriptures from Psalm 20, a balm was poured over my soul and freshness awakened within me.


New Strength ~ New Peace ~ New Energy!


Everyone needs Encouragement now and then. It doesn't have to be a Pirate Party - a card to your neighbor, an email to a friend, a text to your spouse - those words mean so much.  





Your words of love and truth can bring life and hope to a hurting heart. 







Who needs to your Words of Encouragement?  
Ask the Lord to show you - in the grocery store, in your workplace, at school,
in your own home - who needs to hear words that
bring life!




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