Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Testimony Tuesday - Take the Plunge!

---I would like to set aside Tuesdays as the day we testify to God's work in our lives.  I say we because I have asked women at the River Church to share what God is doing in their lives and families.  These are their stories!  "They defeated him [the accuser] through the blood of the Lamb and the bold word of their witness." Revelations 12:11 (MSG)---

For the next few weeks I will be sharing a few testimonies from our women's retreat.  These are awesome!

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I climbed a mountain today and it kicked my butt.  I was encouraged by a dear friend to take my time but get to the top as the view would be worth it.  We did make it to the top and she was right -- the view was breath-taking.  A view of the valley all the way from Vallecito to the north, to the mountains in Ignacio to the south.  It was a beautiful site of course, as is all of God's creation.  We soaked it in caught our breath and then headed down.  I was reminded at the bottom of how small my world point of view is, compared to God's.  God can see everything, from the north to the south, east to the west.  He sees the lakes and the rivers, streams, roads and people.  And He can see it all at once.  We, however, can only see the path He's set in front of us...and sometimes not even that.  The rocks and trees sometimes stand in our way.  But He sees.  He knows.  He sets our path for a purpose.  He has things to accomplish, and in that I have found obedience to be joyful.  Even though it's sometimes hard, it sometimes brings pain and sometimes takes your breath away.  I will trust His view from the top of the mountain, to guide my steps on the path below.

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I was married for 10 years.  We had a beautiful, loving, godly marriage.  We served in ministry as youth leaders for 7 years in 2 different churches in Durango.  I've struggled with addiction since I was a teenager.  I have felt the hopelessness and the utter turmoil addiction causes.  My husband divorced me.  I ended up in rehab.  I have seen where addiction can lead.  I saw people that were hanging on for dear life.  I saw a man who had just slit both wrists and was not breathing.  I saw people have seizures due to their addictions.  People that had been in jail dozens of times, people who had lost everything...their families, their homes, their dignity, relationship with God and much more. My heart has turned from God due to my divorce.  I've always had a passion to serve.  My deepest hearts desire is to see people healed, to be a messenger of God's love and redeeming power.  I took the plunge this weekend deciding I am FINALLY going to go back to school so I may work in a rehab facility.  I went there originally to save my life and it is there where I found my life.  I want to follow this passion God has ignited in my spirit to see lives saved, to see chains of bondage broken.  Fear has stopped me.  I no longer walk in that fear.  Today I choose to follow what I know God has called me to do.  Heal the sick and bind up the broken hearted.

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HE FREED ME!!!!

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How can I tell you of the RELIEF it is to KNOW that God isn't MAD? Failed marriage, even though I tried with all I had for far too many years. GOD IS NOT UPSET WITH THAT FAILURE. (notice...not my failure, but THAT failure, because it does take 2 to tango).  A reset on the heart, just to see that the condemnation I was giving heed to not only never came from GOD but WOULD NEVER come from Him...and now I am Free - to love Him, to love others, to enter into the joy of my LORD!!  No failure makes me unusable in His hand, believing such a lie (that your failure renders you unusable, rejected) believing this would make me unusable.  Mountains moved, a country crossed, hope restored and being able to FEEL the beating of His great heart of Love for me again...My testimony? That NOTHING can separate me from His love!!!  Where we goin' next Jesus?

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I was the woman Jill was talking about.  I was the lonely one.  I've battled loneliness since I was a child.  But, right before the retreat, God revealed that I had believing a lie that I was alone.  Once I confessed to Him and asked His forgiveness for believing that lie, I felt something break.  And coming here, I haven't felt lonely.  Not once.  And that in itself is a miracle.


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