Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Testimony Tuesday - Women's Retreat Part 3

More testimonies from our women's retreat!
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This weekend I started out picturing my "house".  It was a solid foundation but bare.  I stood in the middle of it with a hammer in one hand and a nail in the other, not sure what to do next.  This weekend was a confirmation of the work that He is already doing in my life.  I am not finished yet, but I feel like I can honestly say that I am finishing out the weekend, side-by-side with the Master Carpenter, nailing the first board into place.
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I am not just a face in the crowd to Jesus!  He sees me specifically!
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This weekend Father took me into the deep water, as the Oceans song speaks.  He led me where my feet failed so that I could experience His power through me!
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He is proud of us, His creations!
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We don't have to understand God completely in order to follow immediately.  For years God has been telling me to invest my time and talents to be part of a church family. As I was walking along the river trail, God's creation opened up to me and this is what He showed me about my fear of investing in people.

I was blessed to see with fresh eyes the oak brush leaves.  There were many leaves all connected to a branch.  Although they were changing colors-in a transformation- they were pliable and supple and fastened to the main source of life, the branch.  The leaves were so diverse in color and they were all similar shape - oak leaves - by they were in such diverse progression of change.  The color patterns were beautiful - individually and collectively the display was overwhelming.  I experienced God's mystery.  We all develop at different rates and we all have different talents and levels of time - yet we each are so vital to display God's beauty, His purpose and pleasure.

This is my beginning to risk sharing my talents and time for God's glory.
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God solidified my position in Him and His in me.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Testimony Tuesday - Women's Retreat part 2

For the next several weeks I'll be sharing testimonies from women who attended our women's retreat.  It's so good to see all that God did while ladies were away with Him for the weekend.  Let's celebrate His goodness!
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Bridge - 
Hey Bridge! Hi bridge! My friend.  I say here last year, so much pain, wanting to belong, to fit in.  I say on you, bridge, and watched the water rush away from me, hoping my pain would be carried away by the waters.  Hello bridge. I am back.  And you know what God is saying to me now? 
"STRENGTH! Do you feel it? Strength! No, your life is not perfect but your love, your security, in ME is so much stronger than it was last year." 
What do we work on this time God? 
"Let my love define you." 
Bye bridge - see you next year.  God willing.
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I am unique...I am not anyone else...I don't have to be anyone else...because He loves me.
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I have always had a problem with my body image.  The world looks at women's bodies like they need to be tiny.  I realized this weekend that this body has been a vessel for three beautiful children and that is the reason why my body is not perfect.  I, of course, knew that but I guess have never thought that was a good enough reason to not have a better looking body.  Now I feel this body is what has allowed three children to have life and THAT is a beautiful thing.  My body is NOT perfect and that's ok.
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God got rid of a root of bitterness I had against Him because I felt like I wasn't created to be enough - not influential enough, not beautiful enough, not talented enough.  Such lies!  No more bitterness and now I'm free to live in the truth of who He has made me! Yay Jesus!
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Do not cover our shame and sin up - go "naked" before the Lord.  We must also be understanding and pray and forgive those that also cover up their sin and shame with lies, anger, control, etc.  And pray; pray hard - believing that God can and will break through all the learned family bondage.  Give grace, love and a quiet spirit so that God can move in them.  Do not give up on them or yourself.
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This weekend has spoken to me in regards to being a woman in so many ways and has caused me to see myself and my struggles differently. One way specifically is coming before my Savior naked in my hurts and actions and emotions.  Trusting that He truly is ok with me and His love is great than all that yuck.  My plan now is to continue to put this "nakedness" before Him into action.
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Thank you for taking me "back to the beginning"  I praise Jesus for giving my heart a home, for giving me value and self worth and comfort.

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Testimony Tuesday -- Women's Retreat

For the next several weeks I'll be sharing testimonies from women who attended our women's retreat.  It's so good to see all that God did while ladies were away with Him for the weekend.  Let's celebrate His goodness!
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I am enough for Him.
We are enough for Him.
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I am life-giving.  Even if I have believed the voices of the world telling me that because I've never had a child I'm not.  I choose to hear and believe the voice of the Lord who tells me that I am.
I am life-giving even though my womb is empty.
I will trust in the Lord.
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God FASHIONED us!!!!
Eeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
He gave me a picture of an artist/potter creating a masterpiece...and the time that it takes to create such a piece with such immeasurable value.  The eye for detail, the subtle intricate elements, endless hours spent "bedazzling" such a work of art.  Perfection as seen by The Creator takes time...it is not finished.  Just as our "becoming" what HE has in mind...our "divine design" takes time.  We are to ENJOY the time that He creates into His masterpiece...we won't be disappointed.
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God challenged me to be Mary, to be an example of Mary to my children.
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God's been calling me and showing me how to come to Him raw and unfiltered.  So often I try to "pull myself together" before going to God.  He wants me to bring everything to Him RAW, pour out my heart to Him, rest in Him.  HE wants me to trust that He is who He says He is and that He is transforming me and doing a new thing.  He's calling me into His reality---calling me to be real.  He's revealing to me His redemption and restoration.
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I have never doubted that God loves me, cherishes me, values me, desires relationship with me, that God would never bring me to anything that He would not bring me through, that He would lead me, or carry me to where He needed me to be, but this weekend God showed me: I AM WORTHY of being loved by Him unconditionally!

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