Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Testimony Tuesday - Take the Plunge!

---I would like to set aside Tuesdays as the day we testify to God's work in our lives.  I say we because I have asked women at the River Church to share what God is doing in their lives and families.  These are their stories!  "They defeated him [the accuser] through the blood of the Lamb and the bold word of their witness." Revelations 12:11 (MSG)---

For the next few weeks I will be sharing a few testimonies from our women's retreat.  These are awesome! 

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I came this weekend with no expectations but a lot of need.  And though I was afraid to hope He would, God met those needs and did some serious work in my heart!  Just like He saw Leah, He let me know that He sees me! (that message was word for word God speaking directly to me btw!)  My heart's cry has been to be seen by Him and to feel that.  And He did that for me this weekend. He did so much more than I can adequately explain, but I'll just say that I had a very sweet encounter with my God this weekend and I feel so loved and richly blessed!

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If asked before this weekend...I would've told you that the River was my kiddos church, not mine.  

You can:
  be the perky, goofy, joyful and quirky one.
  be given the job of a "woohoo girl" at the start of the retreat
  go to every women's breakfast
  even speak at a women's breakfast
  be awesome friends with the dork wad on the River staff (Jen Kline :) )

...and still feel lost in the crowd and unknown.  After this retreat I can say that I really know people and I feel known.  The River is now my church! :)

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God has worked so many miracles in my life and I'm just beginning to discover some of them.  I was sexually abused as a very young girl, then again and again as I was growing up.  I was baptized when I was about 11 years old but I really hadn't trusted God.  My step-father was an alcoholic (so was my father and we really didn't have contact with him after I was 10 years old).  My step-father was one of my abusers.  I was told when I was a senior in high school that I neede to see if there was a friend I could live with because my step-father was on a drinking binge.  I lived away from home and felt very unwanted.  I became promiscuous feeling that was what was expected of me.  I became pregnant at age 18.  I had my son and moved back home until I could get settled on my own.  My behavior did not change much and I became pregnant again.  I told the father of this child (I did not tell the father of my first child).  He was not supportive and doubt that he was the father.  I felt I could not have another child alone and I chose abortion.   I have not been in many relationships since then.  Although I have struggled through all of this, financial burdens, and the feeling of unworthiness and so many other things, I can look back and see God's hand in all aspects. I had a healthy child, he's provided food and shelter and income!  He's brought the best people into my life to support me on my walk with Him and to completely surrender to His will.  

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Give it up, take it back, give it up, take it back, give....well you get the idea.  It wasn't that what I heard last night was anything new - I know those truths all too well.  I think it was when Jill said that it was more difficult to keep carrying those rocks than it was to let them go.  Maybe it was the power of all those women who stood and flung.  Maybe it was the power of the Holy Spirit that filled the room and gave me new resolve.  And I flung, too.  I flung and I don't every want to pick those things up again.  Thanks be to God!

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If my people will humble themselves and pray....
This verse has come to me over and over throughout this year.  But I always asked others to pray; always looked to others prayers to help me and mine in and through our troubles.  God has revealed to me how important and necessary my praying is.  He has shown me that my prayers are as powerful and necessary as others.

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